imprints of Mexican children circumnavigate your curves;
the lady like bootlegger mudflaps covered the cracks
and saw all the pipes heating up till they busted
haiku's not written yet were already learned from an early age
You stepped from this world into a garden and the garden is You.
planted in sawdust and watered by cowboy spit-
at least you got off and out of the pot
Yage screenprints the mind in tide-dyes of ultraviolet
or was it infrared? I can never remember which is denser
or which caused the riot.
a priestess still taking confessions of remorse
Why, B. Did he do it?
broken toilet bowls spell out Y E S like alphabet soup once purged into its crevasses
porcelain dolls with cracked heads never made it that long anyways.
I stepped into the Garden and it was You.
1 comment:
This seems vague and feels as if the reader would benefit from further knowledge of the subject (which is not always the poets fault nor should the poet be concerned if that was the initial point).
A couple of the line raise some questions. Is the lady the speaker is addressing the "You" in the fifth and last line? What was the riot (infrared as in what police use for night vision?) and what were its ramifications? Who is B and why are the toilet bowls broken?
I think the poem takes place in some sort of low income housing/garbage dump/cesspool but I'm not entirely sure. Despite the mention of the garden, I read it with those things in mind and it was a real treat to envision
Certain lines in the poem are great ("imprints of Mexican children..." "broken toilet bowls spell out Y.E.S...." "porcelain dolls with cracked heads...") and resonate nicely with the images portrayed. They just seem a little cryptic. I think if you threw some punctuation in this poem it would read a lot more easily!
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